Biggest thing, that I have done is..working with my head. Like usually, I know. But now that subject is: how I see me now?
As I told before, I have lost weight a lot and also got some muscles. I am a bit proud, for all that hard work. I looked some old pictures about me and I didnt recognize myself from those pics.
This is, what I have tried to understand now: How I look now. I dont mean that kind of thinking, that do I look fabulous or not, no. I mean, how my body looks in my eyes now. There´s more in to that.
I dont see all that change, not so like others do. I see..well, something is changed, but much? Well..I dont know....maybe?
Of course there´s a big change. But my eyes and brains dont get it. Funny, yes?
Then I started to think...there´s a point, when human, who says, that even thought she/he is small as a doll... maybe having anorexia.. what you see in mirror can be so different that what other sees.
It is so easy to say, look! You are so small..eat a bit. When she or he sees something else.
No, I´m not having that and yes, eating with good appetite!
But now I understand, how wrongly I can look myself. My coach said once, that mirror is the worst tool when you are loosing weight. There´s so much emotions involved.
That is so true, When you look at yourself from mirror, can you be neutral? Or do you find those bad things first...
So, as important is to work hard when you are loosing your weight..as important, or even more important is to keep your head involved. I can say, it´s both physical AND mental work. Sometimes that mental is harder that pure training.
So, this is what I have done lately. Keeping my head together. Learning to see, what I have done already. Trying to be happy about that. And a bit proud, too..not too much.
Oh, and yes: