keskiviikko 8. helmikuuta 2012

getting more intimate

This journy with this blog is really educational for me. Actually in many ways.
First of all, this challenge me to open up more , and that is very important for my book. I need to be honest there, and also here. Honest to myself . Write what i really think, see who am i.

And i love to notice, that somebody reads this! Thanks! :) So, that means, that something i say, is interesting?? And that´s also so good feeling. It´s like writing diary, but not so privately. I do have diary, and i keep it day after day.. Of course it is more intimate and there is no sencor.

I dont know, if i should write here more without that sencor. I open up really slowly.. I´m sure that I`m getting more bold of my writing here the more i write. It´s silly, couse in that book of mine it´s easyer write more and bolder? It´s like camera vs live audience: I love camera, and i dont get nervous at all front of it! Never, i love it. But live audience... omg... i will freeze in seconds!

I have had a chance to know more about my family, my roots. Both, my father´s and mother´s side comes so great artist, creative persons and so good peoples. I´m very grateful for the legacy of been creative. I have so great tools inside of me, and i just have to learn to use those properly.

I was reading myself to be a nurse, couse i really love to help people. But still, something was always missing. Like i liked it, but not loved.. Just like you meet a new person, go on a date. There´s nothing wrong with you´re date, but it just dont turn you on. It´s ok, nothing more. That´s how i felt. Then i guit reading and started to write. And wow, i was (still am) on fire!!! That´s what i wanna feel, when i do my job. Or live my life. I dont want to settle for second best, I want it all ;) Ok, I know, that it just cant be fireworks all the time, but sometimes it is :) Life i mean....

That´s all for today
all the best, all of you,

Maarit

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